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Just Four, Not More

Etiquette for Twice-Two Urinals

Well with four urinals, the decisions start to really pile up. Even if all four urinals are empty upon your arrival, there is still a lot of thinking to do. Ideally, you should still choose a nice, clean smelling urinal at either one of the ends. However, certain extenuating circumstances have set precedence for the selection of one of the two inner urinals. The reason that this is acceptable is that the selection of an inner urinal does not decrease the potential M.P.P.N.B.A. (Maximum People Peeing Not Beside Anyone). Therefore, if, say, a large deposit of nuclear waste has located itself in BOTH of the end urinals, an inner urinal may be employed, preferably the one farthest away from the largest nuclear waste deposit.

What about if someone is already there? Well, much like the other situations, pee if you can without peeing beside anyone, and otherwise lapse into delay tactics or stall deceit strategy. In fact, because the MPPNBA’s are identical for three and four urinals, etiquette is greatly preserved across the platforms.

  1. The Ideal Situation – Etiquette for One Urinal
  2. Two Urinal Tango – Etiquette for a Pair of Urinals
  3. Three’s Company – Faced with Three Urinals
  4. Just Four, Not More – Etiquette for Twice-Two Urinals
  5. Five, Five, Five – A Handful of Urinals
  6. Six, Six, Pick up Sticks – A Whole Wad of Urinals